“The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn’t exist.”  – Verbal Kint

 

Ryan Seacrest is the devil.  I know this to be true because it is, in my humble opinion, that pop music is the sole reason for the current downslide of society.  Our children are in trouble and why?  Because their heroes are the likes of Miley Cyrus, Taylor Swift, KeiSha and some European chick who has the balls to call herself Lorde.  Seacrest is their puppet-master.

If my daughters were old enough to consider listening to and watching a girl who dresses like a French whore, sticks a foam finger up her nether-region and sings songs glorifying nights out on ecstasy, I’d lose my mind.  Where is Miley’s Dad?  I know one thing…no way KeiSha had a loving father.  No way, no how.  Taylor Swift is the poster girl for ‘Batshit Crazy’ and Lorde sings about driving Cadillacs.  Cadillacs?  My wife is gorgeous, brilliant and was raised right…she drove a Nissan Sentra till she was 25 years old!  The target demographic for these idiots’ acts are the highly impressionable 11-18 females.

I admit it.  I sound like a bitter old man.  Truth is, these moronic billionaires don’t bother me at all.  I can tune them out.  But Seacrest?  He peddles them.  He’s syndicated in every major city discussing them like they’re his gal pals.  I’m now convinced he’s a gal, himself.  He is the total embodiment of the opposite of a sports fan.  Not too long ago, I heard him go on a tirade (well, what a tirade sounds like coming from a 15 year old gymnastics student) about the Dodgers’ post-season.  Shut up.  In my world, there are rules for being a sports fan and you, young lady, don’t fit the bill.

Is that barbaric?  Yeah.  Don’t like it?  Get in the closet.  It aggravates me to no end when fruits like him or Mario Savedbythebell attempt to come off like jocks.  There’s a place for you clowns.  It’s called The Bravo Network.  Go there.  Stay there.  Leave sports to the big boys. 

SATAN IN MIDDLE SCHOOL
SATAN IN MIDDLE SCHOOL

(And who hasn’t muttered to themselves about Seacrest, ‘Sheesh, this guy sold his soul to the devil…’)

 

HERE are YOUR Week 12 NFL Notes & Musings…

 

Arizona WR Larry Fitzgerald is the youngest player in NFL History to catch 11,000 passes.

 

Tony Romo has the most wins in the 4th quarter or overtime over the last three years.

 

Have to admit, I’m a fan of Julian Edelman.

 

The Baltimore Ravens tied a franchise record with a sack in 22 straight games.

 

Ben Roethlisberger is now 37-11 against divisional opponents.

 

If I were Howie Long and I saw my son fly off the sideline to pull his brother off a sticky situation that could lead to a personal foul, I’d have one emotion:  Pride.

 

Calvin Johnson racked up 861 receiving yards over the last five games, a franchise record.

 

I suppose Matt Flynn is on his way to another whopping NFL contract?  If I were Green Bay, I would retain his services.  Other than Rodgers, he runs their offense best.

 

If you have a pulse and weren’t ensconced in the San Diego / KC, Dallas / NY, or New England / Denver games then, well…you’re not someone I want to have a conversation with.  Ever.  Three sensational games this past weekend!

 

If you’re reading this and you sat through four quarters of Jacksonville / Houston, email me.  I am taking you out for a drink.

 

San Diego has now won 10 of it’s last 12 against Kansas City.  Antonio Gates became the fourth tight end in NFL history with 700 catches and 9,000 yards.

 

Am I the only one that envisioned Colts owner Jim Irsay slumped over a 1940’s leather back chair drooling and crying with a half empty glass of 100 year old scotch Sunday night?

 

Chicago RB Matt Forte is now second in franchise history in yardage with 6,178…just a tad behind the greatest football player of all time, Walter Payton who has nearly 11,000 yards more.

 

Arizona reached it’s highest point total in three years.  This is a dangerous team coming in to the Linc next week.  Carson Palmer is playing as well as he ever has and the Cardinals defense boasts a tough front seven and extraordinary secondary.

 

Against the Raiders, Tennessee had a 300 yard passer (Ryan Fitzpatrick) and two 100 yard receivers, (Kendall Wright and Justin Hunter) for the first time since 2004.  Ironically that day, the opponent was also Oakland.

 

The Arizona Cardinals have already scored more points this year with 254 than all of last year when they only scored 250.

 

Despite the loss, I love what Raider QB Matt McGloin has done with his opportunity the past two weeks.  Keep in mind, he was a WALK ON at Penn State and didn’t really show promise until Bill O’Brien arrived.  He also went undrafted in the NFL.

 

Denver further grew their NFL record by scoring 25 points or more in, now, 16 straight games, though it was New England who is now 6-0 at home this year.

 

The more I watch both Colin Kapaernick and Bobby Griffin this year, the more I’m concerned about their careers, long term.  Griffin needs to re-invent his game as a pocket passer and Kapaernick’s throwing motion looks he hasn’t spent five seconds with an experienced quarterback coach.  It’s the worst throwing motion of any starter in the league.

 

And finally, week twelve concludes the season’s bye weeks.  It’s full speed ahead as the league enters it’s stretch run.  Already you’re seeing teams like Pittsburgh and Arizona start their push and teams like Indianapolis and the New York Jets begin their fade in to oblivion.

 

It’s a holiday week so I won’t be on with Big Daddy Graham on 94.1 WIP in Philadelphia this Friday morning but I’ll be back next week!  Follow me on twitter:  @darrendegaetano

 

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone!!

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Darren DeGaetano
A lifelong buddy of Voodoo Brown's, Darren was born in Philadelphia and resides with his family in South Jersey. His resume includes ten years producing sports radio in Philadelphia and five years as a writer, director and producer for NFL Films. His weekly NFL NOTES & MUSINGS column provides his thoughts, anecdotes and eye opening statistics that happened over the previous weekend. Additionally, every Friday, Darren offers his "What 2 Watch 4" column to set you up for the coming weekend football action. Darren's best known annual piece features his Darrentees, a collection of NFL bold and not so bold predictions for the season at hand. Finally, Darren is a full time NFL Insider for Philadelphia's Sportsradio 94.1 WIP and co-hosts the Thursday night / Friday morning overnight show with Big Daddy Graham and can be heard on the official Philadelphia Eagles post-game show. He also likes red wine. Lots and lots of red wine.

3 COMMENTS

  1. Lorde actually denounces the Cadillacs…and the Maybachs…and diamonds on the timepiece.
    Darren, out! (Drops mic)

  2. I think technology is the devil. Probably a good conversation we can have over the holidays along with some film breakdown and x’s and o’s talk with cousin Phil. If my phone isn’t busy leave me a message on my answering machine or hit me up on my beeper and we’ll get together.

  3. I don’t know how i got on this blog, but You, my friend, are bat shit crazy. I would love my son to turn out like Seacrest. Professional, an over achiever, and filthy rich. He worked his ass off to get to where he is at without any legal drama. I see that as a great role model. Don’t hate because you’re jealous. And you are going to bash Lorde and Taylor Swift? Again, two people that worked their ass off to achieve a dream and are also very professional and good role models.

    I agree that Miley and Kiesha are worthless.

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